My memo to Sheldon Adelson
The wing-nut billionaire is in the market for a few good Republican pols. I guess his stable is running low on horses. He's got a few old nags but no winners in his gold-plated paddock. So when they read his want ads, GOPers sprinted as fast as their hooves would carry them, out to Vegas to kiss Adelson's
On the outside is Romney running neck and neck with Jeb Bush. Chris Christie is wheezing as he rounds the turn. Then there's Rand Paul and the guy from Wisconsin (whatshisname?) bringing up the rear.
And the winner is --- oops, there ain't no winner.
“I don’t want to spend millions on another loser,” said Adelson, who purchased both Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney in 2012. The casino magnate was scathing in his assessment of the candidates he declined to buy, calling them “a third-rate grab bag of has-beens and dimwits.” -- BorowitzForbes reports that in the two days since he hosted the Republican Jewish Coalition’s meeting with all these losers and ne'er-do-wells, at his Venetian Resort and Hotel, Adelson personally made $2.1 billion — 21 times the $100 million he reported giving away during the 2012 presidential election. So he can easily afford to buy a potential winner. So I decided to drop Adelson a line and offer some suggestions.
Here's my memo to Sheldon:
Mr. Adelson (or may I call you Sheldon?),
I sympathize with you in your effort to purchase a potential 2016 GOP winner among this gaggle of cretins and boneheads. Here's my advice to you. Believe me Sheldon, I may be
