He Has Rasputin Eyes: A Parody of "Bette Davis Eyes"
Verse 1:
His gaze is like a laser,
It’s cutting through the room.
He’s got a beard so wild,
It’s like a Russian cartoon.
You’d better watch your step,
Or you’ll be hypnotized.
He’s got that mystic power,
He has Rasputin eyes.
Chorus:
He’s got Rasputin eyes,
They’ll pierce right through your soul.
With a stare so deep and bold,
You’ll lose all self-control.
He’s got Rasputin eyes,
A wizard in disguise.
Don’t look too long or you’ll belong,
To his Rasputin eyes.
Verse 2:
He’ll dance around the palace,
And whisper in your ear.
Convince you he’s your savior,
Then disappear with your beer.
He’s got a knack for drama,
And a flair for surprise.
One glance and you’re enchanted,
By those Rasputin eyes.
Chorus:
He’s got Rasputin eyes,
They’ll haunt you in your dreams.
With his beard and magic schemes,
He’ll tear apart regimes.
He’s got Rasputin eyes,
A stare that never lies.
The czars all quake, the nobles shake,
From his Rasputin eyes.
Bridge:
Oh Kash Patel, don’t you know?
You’re caught up in his glow.
You thought you had control, but no—
He’s running the whole show!
Verse 3:
He’ll crash your secret meeting,
And charm the whole darn crowd.
His voice is like a thunderstorm,
But his laugh is way too loud.
You think you’ve got him cornered,
But he’s ten steps ahead.
With just one wink, he’ll make you think,
That you’re the one misled.
Chorus:
He’s got Rasputin eyes,
A look that bends the rules.
He’ll make kings into fools,
And turn rebels into tools.
He’s got Rasputin eyes,
A spell you can’t despise.
You’ll fall for sure, there’s no cure,
For those Rasputin eyes.
Outro:
So if you see him coming,
Just turn and run away.
Don’t let him catch you staring,
Or you’ll be his prey.
His powers are uncanny,
His charm you can’t deny.
Beware the man who rules the land,
With his Rasputin eyes!
*Cue dramatic accordion solo and a cloud of mysterious smoke.*
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