Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy!
It's very gratifying to know that I'm among the few, the proud, the elite, selected by my principal to grade the papers of abject strangers. It will be really exciting for me to contribute to the grades of kids I've never met, and likely never will.
Oddly, this message, though full of praise, neglects to mention the real reason I'm being shipped off to Bayside High School---I cannot be trusted to grade my own students. Those would be the kids I work with day in and day out, the kids whose papers I carry in my bag, the ones I spend hours correcting.
I can't be trusted to grade their papers because I'm prejudiced. I want them to do well. And NY State assumes I am fundamentally dishonest and will give them passing grades for no good reason. The letter should say, "Because you are a dishonest worthless piece of slime, we have determined you are not only unfit to design tests for your students, but also to grade them."
The actual letter reads like this:
Dear NYC EDUCATOR,
Congratulations!
Your principal has selected you to score the Comprehensive English NYS Regents exam for the January
