On Sleeping Children
Years ago I used to walk by the desks and kick the bottom, commenting on what a clumsy oof I was for doing so. This usually stunned students into picking up their heads. However, I had one student who regularly reeked of marijuana, and he did not much care for having his afternoon reveries disturbed. This kid went home and told his dad that I regularly hit him in class. An investigation ensued, and my students all reported this did not occur ever. But I recalibrated my approach.
My next step was to walk around the class, saying whatever it was I had to say, but raising my voice to maximum level when I passed a sleeper. This seemed to work, and did not provoke any formal complaints from the kids. But when you're in a trailer adjacent to another, sometimes other teachers take exception. They may be giving a test, and from time to time question the instructional value of incredibly loud screams during said test.
On Christmas, I received a gift of a sonic screwdriver replica. This is a tool that Doctor Who uses for various tasks on the TV show. The replica is a strange-looking object that extends and makes odd and spooky noises. When placed to the ear of a sleeping student it generally causes a
