NYC Educator: Bloomberg Reaches Out to Educators

NYC Educator: Bloomberg Reaches Out to Educators

Bloomberg Reaches Out to Educators

Hi it's me again, your old pal Mayor Mike. I have a special message for you all. You remember all those things I did and said to you guys? Well, I'm sorry. There. I said it. Do I need to say it again? Don't you believe me?

Anyhoo, I'm a little upset that the guy in the White House, you know who, the one I won't name in my ad, has decided to boycott Bloomberg News just because it isn't delivering any news about Bloomberg. You know, me, Mike, your bestest buddy. How is that fair? I can't have people on the payroll saying bad things about me. That's unacceptable. I expect EVERYONE to pay attention to me, even if my giant news organization pretends I don't exist. AND IF ANY OF YOU LOSERS TRIES TO IMPEACH ME, I WON'T COOPERATE!!! Oh, hold on now, I didn't mean to raise my voice. That's what the other guy does. Okay, I'm sorry. There. Is it all better now?

Now let's look back at what I did for you FRIGGING LOSER TEACHERS!!! Wait a minute. I meant you respected and dignified educators, of course. Now look, I raise my voice now and then but I don't mean anything by it. This is just how very, very rich people express ourselves. Yeah, that's the ticket. Anyway, who was it who took a bold stand against white bread in school cafeterias? That was ME, BITCH! I mean, I did that. Didn't that make your lives better? Don't you enjoy your new svelte waistline, and isn't it all BECAUSE OF ME AND NO ONE EVER SAYS THANK YOU!!! NOOOOO, THAT WOULD BE TOO MUCH TROUBLE!!!

And how about all those new schools I created? Sure, I had to close a lot of old ones, and sure, the  public had no say. I know, you'll say I filled them all up with newbies so there'd be little or no union presence, and that I dumped all the difficult students in larger schools so I could close them too. Well that might be true, and sure, you'll say I built up charters to make a separate and unequal system, by giving money to people who could draw millions from private sources. Okay, I did insist we call them public schools even though the only thing public about them was that they take your money.

I SAVED THE SCHOOLS ALL BY MYSELF, AND ALL YOU FRIGGING TEACHERS COULD DO WAS BITCH AND MOAN!!! YOU'RE AS BAD AS THE NRA!!! SCREAMING ABOUT YOUR FRIGGING DUE PROCESS RIGHTS!! I HAD THAT LONG ISLAND SENATOR, THE IRISH GUY, WHAT'S HIS NAME, READY TO DESTROY SENIORITY RIGHTS, BUT NOOOO, YOU SOBS MANAGED TO WEASEL OUT!!!

Wait. What I meant to say was, we had our differences, but we worked them out. Hey, let's let bygones be bygones, okay? It's not asking too much. I'm a nice guy. Who else CONTINUE READING: NYC Educator: Bloomberg Reaches Out to Educators