BILLIONAIRE BANDITS: THE NOT-SO-EXPERTS OF EVERYTHING
Education is a hot topic these days, but who should we trust to fix our failing schools? Teachers? Education experts? Nah, let's go with a group of billionaires who have no experience in education whatsoever. Because, you know, money equals expertise.
Meet the Billionaire Bandits, a gang of instant experts who are ready to destroy public education with one easy step. Whether it's through charter schools or vouchers, these billionaires are determined to leave a trail of destruction in their wake. And they're doing it all with a smile on their faces and a fat wallet in their back pocket.
First up, we have Bill Gates, the Microsoft mogul who thinks he knows everything about education because he once passed a math test. Gates is a big fan of vouchers and charter schools, which he claims will magically improve student achievement. Of course, he conveniently ignores the fact that these reforms often leave low-income students and students of color behind. But hey, who needs equity when you have billions of dollars?
Next on the list is Reed Hastings, the CEO of Netflix. Hastings is a big proponent of standardized testing, which he believes will hold schools accountable for student achievement. Unfortunately, he fails to acknowledge that standardized tests are often biased against certain groups of students and don't actually measure what students know. But hey, who needs accuracy when you have billions of dollars?
Then there's the Walton family, the owners of Walmart. These billionaires have been pouring money into charter schools for years, despite evidence that shows these schools are not always better than public schools. But hey, who needs evidence when you have billions of dollars? The Waltons are here to save the day (or destroy public education, whichever comes first).
And let's not forget Mark Zuckerberg, the Facebook CEO who thinks he can solve education with a few lines of code. Zuckerberg has been throwing money at education reform initiatives in Newark, New Jersey, but critics argue that his efforts have done little to improve student outcomes. But hey, who needs results when you have billions of dollars?
Last but not least, we have Betsy DeVos, the former secretary of education and champion of school choice. DeVos believes that parents should be able to choose where their children go to school, even if that means funneling taxpayer money into unaccountable private schools. But hey, who needs accountability when you have billions of dollars?
What do these billionaires have in common? Well, aside from an obscene amount of wealth, they all seem to believe that they know better than actual educators when it comes to improving education. They ignore evidence that contradicts their beliefs and push for reforms that often do more harm than good. But hey, who needs logic when you have billions of dollars?
So sit back and relax as the Billionaire Bandits wreak havoc on our schools. Who knows? Maybe they'll accidentally stumble upon a solution that actually works. Or maybe they'll just continue to make a mess. Either way, it's sure to be a wild ride.
Billionaires Are Shoveling Money Into a Los Angeles School Board Race https://jacobin.com/2022/10/los-angeles-school-board-elections-donors-political-machine
Bill and Melinda Gates have spent billions to shape education policy. Now, they say, they’re ‘skeptical’ of ‘billionaires’ trying to do just that. - The Washington Post https://www.washingtonpost.com/education/2020/02/10/bill-melinda-gates-have-spent-billions-dollars-shape-education-policy-now-they-say-theyre-skeptical-billionaires-trying-do-just-that/
Billionaires co-opt minority groups into campaign for education reform | Salon.com https://www.salon.com/2019/08/27/billionaires-co-opt-minority-groups-into-campaign-for-education-reform_partner/
Billionaires for Education Reform (Opinion) https://www.edweek.org/policy-politics/opinion-billionaires-for-education-reform/2011/11
When Billionaires Become Educational Experts | AAUP https://www.aaup.org/article/when-billionaires-become-educational-experts#.ZHY2q3bMKUk
Got Dough? How Billionaires Rule Our Schools https://www.dissentmagazine.org/article/got-dough-how-billionaires-rule-our-schools