Tuesday, September 12, 2023

CHARTER SCHOOL GIRLS TICKET TO RIDE: THE PURPLE MENSTRUAL PASS

CHARTER SCHOOL GIRLS TICKET TO RIDE

THE PURPLE MENSTRUAL PASS 

In the wacky world of charter schools, where rules can be as unpredictable as a chameleon on roller skates, one school in San Antonio, Texas has taken the concept of bathroom passes to a whole new level. Brace yourselves, folks, because we're about to dive into the absurdity that is Great Hearts Western Hills.

Now, let's start with the basics. Bathroom passes are a common sight in schools across the globe. They're usually simple slips of paper that grant students the freedom to relieve themselves when nature calls. But at Great Hearts Western Hills, they've decided to spice things up a bit. Instead of plain old white passes, they've gone for a vibrant purple color. And if that wasn't enough to make you scratch your head in confusion, get ready for this - these purple passes are specifically for female students during their menstrual cycle.

Yes, you read that right. The school has introduced what they call "menstrual passes." These purple slips of paper come complete with a Shakespearean sonnet printed on them. Because nothing says "I need to go to the bathroom" like a beautifully crafted verse from the Bard himself. I can just imagine a student reciting, "Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Forsooth, I must away to the loo without delay!"

Now, the school claims that these menstrual passes were implemented to tackle the rampant abuse of bathroom access. Apparently, students were taking advantage of their bathroom privileges left, right, and center. But here's the thing - why should girls be singled out for having to use a bathroom pass during their time of the month? It's like saying, "Hey ladies, we know you're going through a natural bodily function, so here's a slip of paper to remind you that you're different and should be ashamed of it." Talk about adding insult to injury!

And let's not forget the awkwardness factor. Imagine being a teenage girl and having to explain to your teacher that you need to use the bathroom because Aunt Flo is visiting. It's cringe-worthy enough as it is, but now they have to whip out their purple pass and recite a Shakespearean sonnet just to justify their bodily functions. I can already picture the uncomfortable silence that follows as the teacher tries to process what just happened.

But wait, there's more! The school also sent an email to parents outlining their bathroom policy. Apparently, each student is entitled to four passes per quarter. But here's where it gets really interesting - girls on campus were given an additional colored slip of paper that grants them unlimited bathroom access. Yes, you heard me right. Unlimited bathroom access. It's like they're saying, "We know it's tough being a girl, so here's your golden ticket to the porcelain throne."

Now, I can't help but wonder what other crazy rules exist in this charter school. Do they have a chartreuse pass for students with indigestion? Or maybe a neon pink pass for those who need a break from quadratic equations? The possibilities are endless!

In all seriousness though, it's important to address the underlying issues here. Girls should never feel ashamed or singled out because of their bodies. They should have the freedom to use the bathroom whenever they need to, regardless of their menstrual cycle. And let's be real - students will always find a way to abuse any system, even with these so-called menstrual passes.

So, Great Hearts Western Hills, let's take a step back and reevaluate these crazy charter school rules. Let's create an environment where all students feel comfortable and respected, without the need for purple passes or Shakespearean sonnets. And hey, if you're ever in need of some wacky bathroom pass ideas, I'm just a phone call away. I've got a whole rainbow of colors and literary quotes ready for you!

Until then, let's flush away these ridiculous rules and embrace a world where bathroom breaks are as simple as answering nature's call. And remember, folks, when life hands you purple passes, just laugh it off and keep on rolling - because sometimes, you've just got to find humor in the absurdity!

Texas charter school issues menstrual passes for students https://www.mysanantonio.com/news/local/article/san-antonio-schools-bathroom-pass-18360218.php