Mom shaming or constructive criticism? Perspectives of mothers
Mothers of young children face numerous parenting decisions, starting with choices about infant feeding methods and sleep position, to daily decisions about toddler diet, discipline and health/safety. Some mothers have a support system that offers encouragement during the challenges of parenting a young child; other mothers face negativity and second-guessing of their parenting choices. The C.S. Mott Children’s Hospital National Poll on Children’s Health asked a national sample of mothers of children 0-5 years old about their perceptions of being criticized about their parenting.
Most mothers (61%) say they have been criticized about their parenting choices, most frequently by family – their spouse/child’s other parent (36%), their in-laws (31%), or their own mother or father (37%). Mothers report less criticism from peers – friends (14%), other mothers they encounter in public (12%), commenters on social media (7%) – or from their child’s health care provider (8%) or childcare provider (6%). About 1 in 4 mothers (23%) have been criticized by three or more groups. Overall, 62% believe that mothers get a lot of unhelpful advice from other people, while 56% believe that mothers get too much blame and not enough credit for their children’s behavior. These beliefs are more common among mothers reporting criticism from multiple groups.
Discipline is the most frequent topic of criticism, reported by 70% of criticized mothers. Other common topics of criticism are diet/nutrition (52%), sleep (46%), breast- vs bottle-feeding (39%), safety (20%), and childcare (16%).
Mothers describe different – and sometimes conflicting – responses to criticism about their parenting. Many seek additional information about a specific topic, either searching for Mom shaming or constructive criticism? Perspectives of mothers | National Poll on Children’s Health: