The Tenure Boogeyman!
One of our recurring cast of characters here at the Jazzman has been the Merit Pay Fairy:
Yo, whassup?
The Merit Pay Fairy lives in the minds of corporate reformers, who believe the Fairy can magically wipe away the "achievement gap" with a mere wave of her wand. Don't bother trying to explain to these corporate reformers thatthe Merit Pay Fairy doesn't exist; like Linus in the pumpkin patch, they fervently wait for the Fairy to show up. And they get very cross and stamp their little feet when she disappoints them again and again.
Well, I think it's time we add another character to our little friends' imaginary, reformy lives. Boys and girls, meet